My Name is Trouble Maker

Submitted by Anonymous


October 2022

Jessica Bensch
Jessica Bensch

On one hand I appreciate working in my organization. I believe in our mission. My salary and benefits are also decent enough.

I am constantly challenging myself and our work - striving for more so we can move closer to our company's purpose.

I believe that I keep a positive focus when raising my point of view but my comments don’t seem to be welcome in my team.

I am seen as a trouble maker. I feel that I have been labeled as such.
I would understand if my thoughts and comments are destructive, but I don’t believe that they are at all. My words are expressed with positive intent.

I have tried in every way I know how to challenge ourselves in a positive way - but my team does not welcome my comments. I am told that I am reactive. I feel ignored, at times isolated, and my overall self feels deflated. My team is so harmonious and so consensus-driven that it is hard to make changes.
I applied for a position in another team. I went through the interviews and I could see very well that my label as ‘trouble maker’ made it into the interviewers' ears.

In our networked organization, there are many people who speak to each other behind the scenes because they are well connected - Talk gets around very quickly.

I did not get the job - although I was given another reason for not getting the job.
I am passionate about my work but this label is hurting me. My company encourages us to be courageous and to challenge the status quo - but I am unable to truly be myself. We say that we nurture psychological safety but this has not been my experience.