You’re Not the Problem - But You’re Still the Reason Things Are Stuck

You’re in every decision.

You’re holding every thread.

Your team waits - for your input, your sign-off, your lead.

And now you feel it: you’ve become the bottleneck.

Not because you lack skill.

Because no one is giving you feedback.

 no feedback is the feedback 

When your team stops sharing what’s not working, that’s not comfort. That’s containment.

• They’re not telling you what’s slow.

• They’re not naming the tension.

• They’re not offering better ways to move.

That silence? It’s not politeness. It’s protection.

And that’s a problem you need to own - fast.

 Feedback Isn’t About You. It’s About the System.

Most leaders say, “I’m open to feedback.”

But systems speak louder than words.

If your team once tried to share and got brushed off, they won’t try again.

If they offered input and saw nothing change, they’ll stop offering.

Now you're left with nods instead of insight. Harmony instead of truth. And slow progress that no one admits is stuck.

That’s how you end up holding it all together - because no one else feels safe enough to help break it apart.

 Feedback Has to Be Normal—Not a Special Event

It shouldn’t wait for a survey.

It shouldn’t be buried in a quarterly review.

And it definitely shouldn’t require a “courageous conversation.”

It should sound like:

• “What’s one thing I could do differently this week?”

• “What’s slowing us down that we’re not talking about?”

• “What’s something you’ve been thinking but haven’t said yet?”

  
  

Quick. Casual. Consistent.

That’s how you signal: feedback belongs here.

 The Quiet Isn’t Confusion. It’s a Coping Strategy.

Your team isn’t unclear.

They’re watching. They’re assessing. They’re deciding what feels safe.

And if your response to feedback is defensiveness, delay, or dismissal - they’ll stay quiet. Even when things are breaking.

Not because they don’t care. Because silence has felt smarter than honesty.

 You Can’t Shift Culture Without Shifting Practice

Want people to speak up? Change the pattern.

• Ask directly.

• Stop explaining yourself.

• Thank them—immediately.

• Show them what changed because of what they said.

• Keep doing it. Even when it’s awkward.

Feedback doesn’t stick because you said it’s safe. It sticks because you keep proving it is.

 Final Word

If your team isn’t speaking up, you’re not the villain.

But you are the system they’re responding to.

And systems don’t change with intention. They change with repetition.

Ask. Listen. Act. Repeat.

It’s not complicated. But it is rare.

Want to stop being the bottleneck?

Be the leader who makes feedback boring - because it happens all the time.